F.A.T. to F.I.T.- Part 4- No Longer A Battle

The Battle of My Son........is no longer a battle!!! I spent many years fighting this battle, fighting others to get them to understand Jake. Below is the battle that I fought for many years and my thoughts about what I needed to do to stop this battle......

Battle of My Son
Trying to understand my son, getting my son to comply. Getting others to understand. Fighting with my son. I need to look at the big picture. Look at my son as a whole, instead of focusing on one part of him. Let go of expectations that I set and work with him to achieve the goals that will help him be successful today and tomorrow.

Part of the problem was that I was focusing on one part of him, it was all about how well he was doing in school. We got him tested, re-tested and tested again. I have a 2" binder filled with test results and meeting notes. I could write a book about the battles that I fought with teachers, administrators, Dano and with Jake.

Last year, I came to the realization that I wanted Jake to succeed more then Jake did. I was trying to keep his head above water and not realizing that I was drowning myself. So, I let go. I quit checking his grades on a daily basis, I quit fighting with him about doing homework. I came to the realization that he was the one who was going to have to pay the consequences for not doing his work.

Fast forward to where I sit today. I let go and here I sit a very PROUD mother of a young man who is a B student! He has worked hard to get to this point. He decided it's what he wanted. He wanted to get good grades so that he could go to college. He asks for help from his teachers when he doesn't understand, instead of not doing the work. He has established goals and is working towards them. He is proud to announce to me his grade point average and how well he is doing in school. We discuss his struggles and his successes, instead of me yelling at him and telling him what he needs to do.

I can't even express how very, very proud I am of Jake. I am soooooooooooo proud of him. School does not come easy for him....he has processing issues. Dano and I have worked with him to advocate for himself, to communicate to his teachers, to have goals, to understand that some things don't come easy and that in order to be successful in life you have to work hard!!!

Jake is not only doing well in school, he is a great athlete,and a very caring, sensitive and determined young man. Yahoooooo! Way to go Jake! I am soooo proud of you! Hard work does pay off! Love you! Mom